Love Smacked: How to Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency to Find Everlasting Love
After Rihanna and Alanis Morissette and Amber Smith and Rachel Uchitel, we’ve all heard about love addiction–people who feel they can only be happy when they are deep in an all-consuming love. There are a handful of books about it (including Facing Love Addiction by Pia Melody, Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood, Love Addict by Ethlie Ann Vare, and others), and many rehab and recovery centers are now advertising that they help clients with love addictions and codependency. But no one has approached the subject of its equally damaging cousin–relationship addiction. Relationship addicts are so in love with love and romance and being coupled up that they continually move from one relationship to another, always on the rebound, never giving themselves time to heal and learn how to be independent. They get into relationships again and again, just to avoid feeling lonely–or worse, to avoid feeling “abnormal.” Love Smacked will address all of these issues, looking at early childhood trauma and how that affects our subsequent choices in partners, and how we approach love and relationships. It will discuss the lessons we learn from our upbringing and social and cultural background–lessons that sometimes teach us what healthy relationships look like, but sometimes teach us something else: that we don’t deserve any better; that a typical relationship looks turbulent and difficult; that if we ask for better for ourselves, people won’t like us or want to be with us.